just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Randomize
