I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Randomize