singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
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