Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize