honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Randomize
