Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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