I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
