I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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