i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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