i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Randomize
