so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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