the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
