he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
