The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
