Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Randomize