do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize