There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
