I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
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