Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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