Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
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