"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
i drank out of a bidet.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
