dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I believe in your delicious
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Randomize
