just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
