you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize