i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
