OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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