Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
Randomize
