It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
I have surprise drugs for everyone
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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