It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Randomize