Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
