Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
you told grandpa to call you daddy
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
