whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
