Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
her facebook's as public as her vagina
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Randomize
