Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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