How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
