shes about as inviting as chlamydia
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
