he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Randomize
