no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
