He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize