no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
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