I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
either way he was missing a nipple.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
