Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
