I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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