i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
Randomize
