Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Randomize
