The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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