So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Randomize