I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
...so i touched it.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
