He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Randomize
