thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize