That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
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