Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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