Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
